Finding Our Way Home
by sarahmich
Summary: Five years after high school Blaine and Sebastian run into each other. They haven't spoken since their junior year but when they meet again all of their emotions come flooding back. Will the pair be able to get over the past and reignite the spark?
1. Chapter 1

Blaine was sitting in his favorite coffee shop stressing out over the lines for an audition he was going to that afternoon. In about a half an hour to be exact and he was blanking. He picked up his coffee cup and sighed in frustration when all he sucked back was air. Just as he was about to go over his lines one last time a long and muscular hand placed another cup right in front of him.

"It's so crazy. I was sitting over there checking out this guy when all of a sudden I'm like 'wait a second I know that hair'" Blaine's eyes tighten as the line and that voice tugs at an old memory of his. He lifts his eyes from the cup scanning the body before him, tall and lean with definite hints at well-defined muscles stood there. When Blaine's eyes finally reached the man's face, despite himself, he gasped a little bit. "Although, you did use a lot more gel back then…" Sebastian stood before him with a hopeful smile. Or maybe a God-I-Hope-You've-Forgiven-Me smile, either way it tugged at Blaine.

The pair hadn't seen each other for a little over five years and hadn't spoken since regionals their junior year in high school. After the slushie and all the madness with Dave Karofsky they had completely fallen out. Now, five years after high school Blaine was living in New York and apparently so was Sebastian. They stood face to face staring at the other for what seemed like hours but was more like minutes. Sebastian was waiting for Blaine to say something. Anything. He had sat across the coffee shop four almost an hour trying to get up the courage to go over and speak to him and the first thing out of his mouth was that dumb ass line he had used long ago at The Lima Bean. He couldn't read Blaine's expression and it was slightly unnerving to him.

Blaine finally broke the store and immediately started throwing all of his things into his bag, shaking his head slightly. "I, um, I have to go…" He glanced back up at Sebastian as he was throwing his bag over his shoulder, and saw his face fall and eyes squeeze shut. Blaine bit back his apology, picked up the new cup of coffee and headed for the door. Sebastian quickly recovered himself though and followed after Blaine.

When Sebastian finally caught up with him right outside the door he placed a hand on the shorter man's shoulder. "Wait. Please. At least let me apologize."

Blaine's eyes tightened at the touch but he turned back around and stared up at Sebastian. All he could see in the blue eyes was sincerity and a slight twinge of regret. "I… I really can't right now. I have to go and I don't know if…"

But Sebastian cut in "Please. Just once and then, if you want, I'll leave you alone." Sebastian paused, trying to come up with an idea. "Here. Give me your phone and I'll put my number in it and if you decide that you can you can call me and we'll figure it out from there." Blaine sighed but reluctantly handed over his phone to him. Sebastian quickly put his number in the phone and handed it back to Blaine. "Thank you." He said earnestly. Blaine only nodded in response before hurrying off.

* * *

><p>At his audition, Blaine couldn't think or even begin to process what had just happened and who he had just seen. He wasn't ready for this. <em>Five years, <em>he thought as he sat for his turn, _five damn years and I still can't deal with this. _He wanted to hate Sebastian after everything, he wanted to delete his number and never return to that coffee shop. But, the coffee was delicious and his phone seemed to weigh about a thousand pounds all of a sudden. Blaine just couldn't bring himself to admit that he wanted to see Sebastian again, he wanted to hear his voice, and he wanted to know if he really was as different as he had appeared.

The Sebastian that had stood before him today had looked so different to the polo-sporting one Blaine had known when he was seventeen. The new Sebastian had been wearing dark colored jeans, a black crew neck that clung to his chest, a thick grey cardigan, and he had ditched his contacts for a pair of thick black framed glasses. Blaine had also noted that Sebastian had stopped using a lot of his hair gel, only using enough to spike his long bangs up. He would have looked like a complete dork if his body and attitude didn't scream sex. _No, _he berated himself; _you can't let yourself think like that._

His hand twitched towards his phone, after all one quick text wouldn't hurt him too much, right? "Anderson, Blaine?" Someone called out, "You're up." Blaine sighed, it would have to wait. He needed to nail this audition. It was already March and he hadn't gotten any of the parts he had auditioned for. His father had been very clear, he had a year to get a part and if he didn't he would be back in Lima working for him, and that was the last thing Blaine wanted. He grabbed his sheet music and headed into the room, trying to clear his head.

* * *

><p>Blaine sighed as he unlocked the door to his apartment. Of course, he couldn't manage to get Sebastian out of his head through the entire audition and he's sure he screwed it up. He threw his bag onto the couch and walked straight to his bedroom. After a long, hot shower Blaine climbed into bed, completely exhausted. He shut off his lamp and tried to fall asleep. After a half hour of tossing and turning, and glaring at his phone, he huffed as he snatched it off the night stand and sent one text message.<p>

**Blaine Anderson (1:27am): **Coffee shop at 11. Be ready to talk.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note: **I know this probably seems rather out of character, but please take into account that this is taking place six years into the future and that both characters have been through college and their personalities have changed some. Don't worry though, you will definitely a risqué, snarky Sebastian soon, as well as a cutsie shy Blaine.

* * *

><p>It was nearly 1:30 in the morning and Sebastian had been asleep, well not really if he was being honest with himself, when his phone went off.<p>

**Blaine Anderson (1:27am):** Coffee shop at 11. Be ready to talk.

Well, fuck. He slumped back into his bed without even responding. _He still hates me._ The thought stung him more than he was willing to admit. After all, he hadn't seen Blaine for five years, how could he still feel such a powerful sense of longing for him? Sebastian jammed his eyes shut as he thought back to seeing him at that coffee shop and how had nearly just darted out without a word.

He was sitting a couple tables behind Blaine; and without realizing why, the man with curly black hair sitting hunched over a mess of papers had caught his attention. Sebastian just couldn't look away because those curls and those defined shoulders, and that posture was yanking at some distant memories that Sebastian just couldn't manage to place. When Sebastian was just about to give up and leave the memories hit him like a ton of bricks. Blaine. Blaine Anderson. The one who he thought was long lost to him was in the same town as him, sitting in the same coffee shop, at the same time. At that same instant a wave of hope hit him almost as hard as his pang of guilt. Eventually, though, Sebastian had worked up the nerve to actually go and talk to Blaine.

As Sebastian lay in his bed, all hope of sleep lost, he wished he hadn't opened with that damn line he had used all those years ago, especially since had only used that line to get a rise out of his then-boyfriend, Kurt. _Well you can't take it back now, _he thought; _just add that to the long list of things that you'll talk about tomorrow. _Sebastian sighed as he thought about tomorrow, what was he even going to say to Blaine to make him realize that he truly is different now? _If Blaine is even going to let me talk that much, he might just decide to brush me off again…_

Sebastian tossed and turned the rest of the night until he finally resigned himself to just getting up and getting ready to see Blaine again. As he opened his closet to scan for an outfit he thought about how much Blaine seemed to have changed since high school. His curls, while still gelled to some extent, were a little more floppy and free. The ever present bowties seemed to be goners, as Blaine was just wearing a simple purple V neck and charcoal grey capris pants with matching boat shoes. While Sebastian still found the capris thing completely ridiculous he had to admit it was definitely Blaine. Sebastian grabbed a blue and red striped cardigan with a light grey crew neck from his closet and continued getting ready, mentally kicking himself the whole time for still feeling so much towards Blaine.

* * *

><p>Sebastian was sitting at a table towards the back of the shop sipping his coffee, too nervous to really taste it, when he spotted Blaine for the second time in two years. When their eyes met Sebastian felt a little spark hit his heart and he inwardly cursed himself for it. Blaine signaled that he was going to order before he came over, so Sebastian was left to sit there. And panic. He still had no idea what he was going to say or how he was going to say it. He just knew that if he let Blaine walk out of his life again, so soon after seeing him again, he would regret forever.<p>

When Blaine finally made his way over to the table he didn't say anything. He sat there and sipped at his coffee looking anywhere but at Sebastian. Sebastian was feeling the urge to just get up and bolt, and it looked to him that Blaine felt the same way, but he knew if he did then he lost. He didn't want to lose again. So he steeled himself before giving what was probably the lamest opener ever. "So… Hi."

Blaine almost jumped when he spoke, but he actually raised his eyes to meet the green, blue ones staring at him, "I… I guess, yeah. Hi." His eyes jumped around as he searched for something to add. Finding confidence in the beautiful eyes before him, that seemed to be pleading for this, he continued on. "Look, I don't want this to be awkward. I just think that we could both probably benefit from catching up here, and at the end of this conversation we can see where we're willing to go from there."

There was probably barely concealed hope in Sebastian's eyes as he relaxed in his seat. He nodded in agreement at Blaine before taking a long sip from his coffee. "So where should we start?" He leaned back in his chair absently picking at the edge of the table.

Blaine narrowed his eyes at Sebastian's long fingers and swallowed, "How about, why are you in New York?"

"Well, I guess that's actually an easy one…" Sebastian sighed; he hated to think about it. "My dad gave me a year to 'settle down and work out my rebelliousness,'" he rolled his eyes and made a big show out of making air quotes around his words, "before I get to go be a lawyer for the rest of my life." When he finished he looked over at Blaine, all wide eyed and staring, and couldn't help but let out a small laugh. "What?"

"Well it's just, and I know we weren't friends for that long, but if there was one thing you ever made clear was that you never wanted to follow in your father's footsteps…" He raised his eyebrows at Sebastian who just scrunched up his mouth and cast his eyes away.

"Yeah, so, what about you? What is the great Blaine Anderson doing in New York?" He intentionally avoided responding to Blaine's comment; he just couldn't talk about that anymore. Blaine's eyes narrowed at him for a short second before he suddenly burst into a fit of laughter. Confused, Sebastian's eyebrows knit together, "Okay…What?"

"I just don't know if it's funny or terrible that both of our father's seem to think so much alike." When Sebastian gave no sign of understand, Blaine went on. "My dad gave me a year, to book a part, or I have to go back to Westerville and work at his firm." And before he knew it he had begun laughing again.

This time Sebastian joined in. "God, our father's really do suck don't they?" Two cups of coffee and a piece of coffee cake, each, later the pair had effectively caught up on everything they could about their post high school lives. Everything from where they had gone to college (Yale for Blaine and Harvard for Sebastian) to what all their old friends were currently up to. When they both realized that they were out of non-serious topics a silence fell over the table.

"I think this is up to you now…" Blaine said sheepishly, picking at the lid of his coffee cup.

Sebastian swallowed hard as he thought of what to say. Today had been so great but he knew that if this didn't come out right Blaine would leave and they would never see each other again. As much as Sebastian hated to admit it, he wanted to see Blaine more; he wanted to make things better. So he steeled himself as he started. "I just. I want you to know that, that day at The Lima Bean, after everything with Dave Karofsky happened, I meant what I said. I'm really and truly sorry for that slushie. It was idiotic and childish and a million other horrible things. I wouldn't blame you if you still didn't want to forgive, I could have completely destroyed your eye and at the time I didn't even think twice about it. I'm so sorry Blaine." He took a deep breath as he choked on his next words, "And about the email. I realize that it was probably out of line. I…I just didn't know what else to do and it doesn't even matter because you either didn't get it or you just never replied but after… After that I just couldn't face you anymore. So I would ignore you at competitions, I stopped coming to The Lima Bean and I would disappear when you came to visit Dalton. It was a dumb thing to do, especially since I knew you were trying to get a hold of me…"

Sebastian finally ran out of words and raised his eyes back up to meet Blaine's. They were staring back at him with an almost intense look of indecision in them. Sebastian couldn't understand what the look meant but Blaine seemed to make up his mind before he had to pry it from him, "I got your email." A million things ran through Sebastian's mind but the main thing was that Blaine had read the email and never responded.

Blaine watched as Sebastian's face fell. "Well I guess that's fair…" Sebastian spoke in a small, dejected voice.

Blaine shook his head vigorously, "No that's not! Oh, will you come somewhere with me?" Sebastian lifted his head to look at Blaine, clearly puzzled by the sudden question.

"Where to?" His eyebrow arched high on his forehead, still not able to figure out where this was going.

"Where's the faith? Come on, learn to trust Timon." Blaine smirked at the taller boy as he got up from his seat.

"Oh. Ha. Ha. A meerkat joke. Real cute, Blaine." Blaine shook his head as he rose and followed the shorter man out of the coffee shop.

* * *

><p>"You know, I never pegged you as the one to play the big mysterious type. Seriously, where the hell is this cab taking us?" Sebastian huffed, clearly displeased with not knowing what was going on.<p>

Blaine simply chuckled and nudged Sebastian's shoulder. "Just wait. We're almost there."

There turned out to be Blaine's apartment. Which Sebastian was now standing in the middle of, it was small and cluttered and filled with color. It was perfect for Blaine. "So, not that I'm not flattered you already want to take me home, but what are we doing here?" Sebastian was glad they seemed to be back to their normal banter but the way Blaine was acting had him on edge. He was running around the apartment opening all of the windows and balcony, letting in all the sounds from the New York streets below them, and thoroughly ignoring Sebastian's question. The final thing Blaine did before turning back to him was plug his iPod into the speakers.

"You are going to sing this song to me and you are going to mean every word and prove to me that you are different that this is going to be different and then I will tell you my decision on where I want to go from here." Blaine spoke with confidence and determination, willing Sebastian to want this.

Finally picking up on what Blaine was thinking, Sebastian slowly began to shake his head. "Blaine…"

"Sing the damn song Sebastian or forget it." Blaine actually looked fierce as he pressed the play button on his iPod and the slow melody that Sebastian knew by heart started to flow through the apartment. Sebastian let out a long breath before giving in and humming along to the beginning

_When I look into your eyes  
><em>_It's like watching the night sky  
><em>_Or a beautiful sunrise  
><em>_There's so much they hold_

And as he sang the words he held Blaine's gaze, putting all the emotion he could into the words. He wanted him to know that he still felt it. That he still meant it.

_I won't give up on us  
><em>_Even if the skies get rough  
><em>_I'm giving you all my love  
><em>_I'm still looking up_

Sebastian moved steadily closer to Blaine, still never breaking their eye contact. He held out his hand to the smaller man and when Blaine's finger tips grazed his he spun Blaine into his chest, keeping their hands clasped to his chest as they moved to the rhythm.

_'Cause even the stars they burn  
><em>_Some even fall to the earth  
><em>_We've got a lot to learn  
><em>_God knows we're worth it  
><em>_No, I won't give up_

Sebastian let himself get lost in the music, knowing this was his last shot at making this right. He could feel the slow humming of Blaine on his chest and he closed his eyes and set his chin on the smaller man's curls as he continued.

_I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily  
><em>_I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make  
><em>_Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use  
><em>_The tools and gifts we got yeah, we got a lot at stake  
><em>_And in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend  
><em>_For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn  
><em>_We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in  
><em>_I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not  
><em>_And who I am_

Sebastian let himself really feel the music for the first time in ages. He let himself be hopeful and happy and he let himself find comfort in the small body that was nuzzled up against him.

_I won't give up on us  
><em>_Even if the skies get rough  
><em>_I'm giving you all my love  
><em>_I'm still looking up_

As the song came to a finish and Blaine didn't pull away from their embrace, neither did Sebastian. They swayed like that for what could have been hours, both of them silent until Blaine started whispering into Sebastian's shoulder. "I don't know what to do with myself anymore. I feel so terrible for everything I've done since I came to this town. I need you to understand that I'm sorry and that I wish I could take it all back and start over. Start over all the way back to that day at Dalton when we first met." Sebastian's breath hitched as he recognized the words. He pulled his chin off of Blaine and the shorter looked up into his eyes as he continued on, "If I had handled things better we wouldn't be in this mess and you would be speaking to me. If I had known that I would feel this way I would never have thrown that slushie. I hope that you can forgive me one day. For now, I just need you to know that I will never give up on the way I feel for you. I will never give up the hope that someday there will truly be an us because I don't remember the last time I was fully happy before I met you."

Blaine's eyes became glassy with tears as he went on, "I've never really expressed myself to another person before and I'm not really sure how to. But here's this song. I don't know a better way to get you to understand than by song and I can't think of a better song than this. If you choose not to forgive me, I'll understand after all I really don't deserve it, and I'll leave you alone. If you do, however, choose to forgive me I will never take you or your friendship for granted again."

Sebastian marveled at Blaine, because he knew every word to an email sent six years ago, because he had taken the time to memorize the babbling of a distraught teenager, and because he was that teenager and he had stuck with him this entire time. The pair stared into each other's eyes, hazel on green, Sebastian too dumbstruck to speak. When the stare became deeper, a gaze, and the gaze turned into a longing that had been buried by both of them for so long they both began to lean in to each other.

As their lips were barely an inch apart there was a harsh knock at the door and they both froze. Neither of them moved, they were glued to their spots not willing to lose the moment just yet. Then, came another round of knocks "B open the door! It's freezing out here!"

Blaine flew back and left Sebastian standing there in a daze. "You have a boyfriend…" Sebastian said more to himself than to Blaine.

Blaine simply sighed in response. "I…uh… I just can't explain right now and he can't see you. Please just, please go out the balcony?"

"You can't be serious?" But one look at Blaine's panicked face and Sebastian knew he was. So he backed up towards the balcony, still trying to pull himself out of the almost-moment that they had just had.

"Look I'm really sorry," Blaine whispered hurriedly, "I'll call you later and explain. I swear…" Blaine gave Sebastian one last pleading look and then slammed the balcony door shut and flung the curtains closed.

"Sure you will…" He finally responded. Sebastian stood there for a second, trying to process what had just happened, "guess you already made your decision…" he whispered dejectedly before he swung his legs over the balcony rail and out onto the New York sidewalk.


End file.
